Motherhood and More A Reading List for Mothers Day

Motherhood and More A Reading List for Mothers Day I am a mother, but I am many other things besides: a professor, a friend, a writer, a reader, a wife, a daughter, an enjoyer of lazy evenings on the couch, an obsessive eater of chocolate. Motherhood is a very important part of my identity, but I care about the other parts too, and, of course, this is true for every parent out there. So its nice to come across autobiographical writing about motherhood thats not solely about motherhood. Im a fan of memoirs that put experiences with parenting in the larger context of the writers life. Im not entirely sure why, but I think this kind of memoir has become more popular and common lately. Perhaps we are beginning to get beyond the idea that being a mother should eclipse all other parts of ones life. I hope so. So here are some of my favorite recent memoir-type books that are about motherhood and more: The Argonauts  by Maggie Nelson. This book has two main subjects: Nelsons relationship with the gender-fluid artist Harry Dodge and her experiences with pregnancy, childbirth, and motherhood. Its also a book about theories of sexuality and parenting. Its both highly personal and deeply intellectual; Nelson engages with theorists and philosophers on every page. Nelson is one of my favorite living writers (perhaps my favorite?), and this is a deeply moving, engaging book. I think about her discussion of toddler rage every day (I have reason to think about this every day, as those of you with toddlers can understand.) Year of Yes  by Shonda Rhimes. After a few choice words from her sister, Rhimes realizes she has been living in isolation and fear, and she desperately needs a change. She gets one. This book tells the story of Rhimess decision to say yes to every opportunity that comes along that scares or challenges her. Her relationship with her children is a part of this story, which also includes changes in her career, friendships, and family life. To Rhimes, saying yes to her children means agreeing to play with them whenever they ask, no matter what she needs to be doing. I think about this every day as well. The book also includes a lot of real talk about balancing work and family, and how no one can do this without lots of help. Ongoingness: The End of a Diary  by Sarah Manguso. This book is about how becoming a mother changed Mangusos writing life. It tells the story of Mangusos years of intense diary-writing: she wrote pages and pages and pages trying to capture everything that happened to her. And then she got pregnant and had a child, and could no longer keep this record of her life. Ongoingness is about diaries but it contains nothing of Mangusos diary itself. Instead, its a meditation on what writing can do, and how having a child changes ones relationship to time, identity, and language. Its short, but intense and beautiful. The Folded Clock: A Diary  by Heidi Julavits. This book purports to be a diary, but it reads more like short essays on Julavitss thoughts about anything and everything, including her writing, marriage, friendship, and, of course, her children. Like Manguso, she writes about how having children affects ones sense of time and identity and about how parenthood can be an experience of loss and disorientation, as well as one of joy and love. I love this book dearly. I am constantly rereading it, and I push it into peoples hands whenever I can. What all these books have in common is a companionable voice that takes the reader into the lives and minds of the authors (or, to be exact, creates the impression of doing so). This voice is what I look for in memoiristic-type writing, and its especially valuable when reading about motherhood, which can be so bewildering and isolating. It is such a joy to find books that put into words experiences that are wonderful, strange, and terrifying all at once. And its even better to find this in books that assume children are a large part, but by no means all of, a mothers life. Sign up for True Story to receive nonfiction news, new releases, and must-read forthcoming titles. Thank you for signing up! Keep an eye on your inbox.